The Jeff Booth Show

Internet Radio with Pictures

Show Transcripts

November 8th, 2009

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Jeff@eroticuniversity.com

(818) 613-9248

  Welcome to the show. For some reason, we have a really long sex in entertainment section this week. So long that we have no time for any sex in politics news. Some may be rejoicing over that. It includes a sad personal loss, a great parody web site that almost fooled me, Carrie Prejean’s final comeuppance, T-Mobile flashes back at customers, and hot Mormon Moms. We also have a Sexvestigation that looks at the recent Law and Order abortion episode and points out a number of myths that episode repeats. And, of course, it is Sex Science Sunday, with our usual monthly roundup of the latest in sex and science- including a discovery of the only non-primate to practice fellatio, whether housework is really an aphrodisiac, and deceased comedian Mitch Hedberg’s posthumous contribution to sex science. All this and more, on the Jeff Booth Show

Entertainment

I had a sad duty this week. I had to tell Bastet that her uncle Carl had passed away. Tough news when you are only three years old, plus the fact that she doesn’t understand English. And she’s a cat. Her uncle Carl was a very kind man. He was beloved by everyone who worked with him- as a voice artist, actor, comedian, and magician. Uncle Carl took in her pregnant mother, and after she was born and weaned, she came to live with us. Uncle Carl, known to the world at large as Carl Ballantine, was 92 when he passed. When we last saw him three years ago, he was very active and in a hurry to join his much younger friends at the track. 

Carl was best known for playing Lester Gruber on the 60’s sitcom McHale’s Navy. He appeared on many television shows, and did countless voiceovers, but his favorite performance for me was his parody magic act. His comedic timing was brilliant, and the act was hilarious. In my days as a teenager when I was performing comedy and magic on stage, I got to work with him many times and always enjoyed his act.

I also enjoyed talking with him backstage, and he was always kind and very encouraging to me. Plus, I thought his daughter, who sometimes hung around backstage as well, was very hot. It turns out that I would meet his daughter through one of our social circles many years later, but not realize who she was. Through a mutual friend, I learned that her dad needed to get some kittens adopted, and that her dad was Carl Ballantine.

My cat had just died, and I had not been quite ready for a replacement, but this appeared to be fated. Plus my wife’s cat was pining away- and we later learned that often times the cat left behind does not last all that long without a new companion. So, we went to Carl’s and got a new kitten. And I got to thank him for the kindnesses he showed me when I was but a pup. His response was classic Ballantine “That’s just the kind of guy I am.”

Carl, you had the best timing of just about anyone I have ever seen. And I guess you thought now was the right time. But, you will be missed.

Ad what does any of this have to do with sex? Well, we named our cat Bastet, a more feminine sounding version of what I believe is the proper pronunciation, Bastet, the Egyptian cat goddess. Although when she gets in trouble she does get called a little Bastet. Bastet ruled over sexual lust. It was her job to see that sexual potential was manifested. The ancient Egyptian city of Bubastis was home of the worshippers of Bastet. For centuries, Bubastis was also home to the largest annual orgy in the world. Herodotus reported in the 5th century BCE that over 700,000 people came together to drink wine and have sex with whomever they pleased, wherever they pleased. 

When we have our parties, though, Bastet oversees them from the garage. We worship in our own way. And we have a much smaller guest list.

While double checking my Bastet facts, I came across Christwire.org, and an article on why cats are not a proper pet for Christians and are probably Satanic. It was way over the top, but with the fundamentalist right wing- way over the top is the norm. But this site is actually a parody site affiliated with the Onion. A rather brilliant parody site, as it reads just like a real fundamentalist conservative site. Similar to our VirginPride.com parody site, but this one is much more elaborate. They really understand what they are parodying. The scary thing is how often you can’t tell. The comments sections are filled with comments from people not in on the joke. I have no problem believing that an article called The Golden Girls: How One TV Show Turned A Generation Of American Boys into Homosexuals could be from a legitimate site. Or an article about the evil of computers because of the contributions to their development by known homosexual Alan Turing, including a picture of a protestor holding a sign proclaiming computers a Homo Devil Machine. As the Christian far right gets crazier and crazier, I’m not sure if it get easier to parody them or harder- since no matter how crazy the stuff you come up with is, they are bound to go somewhere even crazier. The Westboro Baptist Church comes up with crazier stuff without even working up a sweat.

As you may have heard, Carrie Prejean sued the Miss California USA pageant, hoping to collect over a million bucks. Or at least her scheming right wing attorney with an anti-gay  political agenda did. Turns out she won’t get a penny. They decided to settle for some attorney fees. Of course her sleazeball attorney is going to make sure he is taken care of. But nothing for Carrie. Why? Because apparently her going into open court would have been quite embarrassing for her. Turns out that there is a bit more than just a few questionable pictures. The queen of morality also made a sex tape, a tape that fell into the hands of the pageant. TMZ claims to have seen the video, and describes it as very explicit. The settlement was sealed, and no one has leaked the actual video, but I so hope it was with another woman. And a gay donkey. 

In British GQ, Nicole Kidman described her wild sex life, saying “I've explored obsession. I've explored loss and love in terms of being in a grief-stricken place, I've explored strange sexual fetish stuff, I've explored the mundane aspect of marriage, and monogamy.' She did not mention her really kinky sexual explorations with a strange short gay cult follower.

Lots of people have taken flashing pictures with their cell phones, and now T-Mobile is apparently returning the favor by having their accounts flash them back. Several people have reported pictures of women flashing showing up on the screen when they access their online T-Mobile account. There have also been reports of some sexually explicit pictures as well. T-Mobile is looking into the problem, but it is taking time as they are having to look very closely.

If the calendar had been called Hot Mormon Muffin Tops, I could understand the reason for the uproar. But it is called Hot Mormon Muffins: A taste of Motherhood. It features Mormon Mom’s in various poses. Think of them as MMilfs- Mormon Moms I’d Like to Fuck. Its not naked- just vintage pin-up poses. It’s from Chad Hardy, the now former Mormon who was kicked out of the church and even had his degree from Brigham Young University taken away because of the similar "Men on a Mission" calendar he created featuring Morman male beefcake. Church leaders say the calendar is not in keeping with Mormon values, which are currently focused on secretly funding hateful anti-gay political campaigns.

Scholastic, the number one publisher of children’s books, told author Lauren Myracle that she needed to make a change in her new book, “Luv ya Bunches”, to remove an offensive aspect. One of the character’s parents were a same sex couple. When word got out, thousands of people complained. Scholastic has had a change of heart. The gay moms can stay- unlike in Maine where they were voted out. Maybe it was hearing from some of those parents of those 200,000 kids with single sex couple parents in America that persuaded them. Or maybe someone pointed out that there was a gay character in their best selling series Harry Potter, after it was revealed that Dumbledore was gay. That revelation did not seem to impact sales at all.

What strange power did Anna Nichole Smith have? Her tragic death resulted from her drug addiction, but it was her ability to get her doctors to get her drugs that amazed me. It wasn’t just her money. She used sex. But in surprising ways. One of the doctors accused of illegally providing her drugs was psychiatrist Khristine Eroshevich. Photos have turned up of her naked in the bathtub with Anna with a sex toy nearby, embracing naked, Krhistine sitting between Anna’s legs, and other sexually suggestive pictures. But, I have seen no evidence suggesting that she is gay. But the other doctor accused, Dr. Sandeep Kapoor , is openly gay. And yet there is video of him in a nightclub shirtless kissing and nuzzling Anna in a very intimate way.   

I am a big supporter of art, and selling it on eBay to raise money for charity seems like a win all around. eBay did not see it that way, and yanked down the auctions, auctions they had already warned them they would not allow. In this case, it was violent art depicting murder of abortion doctors, with the money pledged to the defense fund of Scott Roeder, the man who murdered abortion provider Dr. George Tiller in his own church. The so-called art was signed by Roeder and created by fellow prisoners, and looked like the juvenile scrawling of an artistically challenged but mentally disturbed and future serial killing ten year old. Other items included an Army of God manual telling you how to bomb abortion clinics, and a bible owned by Shelly Shannon, the woman now in prison for earlier attempted to murder Dr. Tiller. It is specially marked up to highlight passages they claim justify murder. Can these assholes get any more offensive?  The family of Tiller pleaded with eBay to prevent the auction, which they did. After being told why their auction was removed, they promptly reposted it using different names and putting periods and hyphens in the words to try and fool the eBay search engines. These auctions were removed as well. In the name of defending those who murder abortion providers in cold blood, no rules need go unbroken for these people.

Auction organizer and Army of God activist Dave Leach wrote to eBay complaining about their removing his auction, and defending his trying to raise money for Roeder to use the necessity defense which claims he had to do it and was justified in murdering people in the name of forcing fetuses to be born. Leach wrote:  “It is all about moving judges in abortion prevention trials to stop censoring the only trial issue, and the only defense, from the hearing of the jury. Does that sound to you like a fanatical, extremist, violence-glorifying, radical goal?” Um, yeah, pretty exactly. Murder and violence is justified, because Jesus made me do it. I’d say you pretty much nailed all of them. Roeder friend, fellow auction organizer,  and death to abortion provider advocate Regina Dinwiddie said of eBay that “They’re not only chilling the First Amendment of the Constitution, they’re raping the whole Constitution.,” Forget that she is commenting on something she has clearly never read, and forget her ignorance that the First Amendment applies to the government and not companies. Ignore the fact that no one is infringing on her right to say the most asinine things. Because of the First Amendment, I can say that Dinwiddie, while she is not raping the constitution, she is skullfucking common sense and basic decency.”

Sexvestigation

In this Sexvestigation, we look at the recent Law and Order abortion episode- an episode filled with lies, distortions, and mythology in a ham handed attempt to present a fictionalized version of the Dr. Tiller murder case in an even-handed way. You know what Dick Wolf? This was a violent murder brought to us through the most violent and radical terrorist group in the United States- the anti-abortion movement. They are responsible for fire bombings, murder, attempted murder, destruction of property, harassment, and an astonishing number of other crimes. Instead of telling the truth, you had to try and depict the story as if there were two side to the story, and try and be sympathetic to the fucking murderers. You don’t do that with a case that involves a Muslim terrorist. No need to show both side then.  

I had given Law and Order a thumbs up on doing an abortions story fictionalizing the horrendous Doctor Tiller murder, especially since the very topic is almost banned from television. In 2005, almost a million and a half American women had abortions. It looks like the abortion rate has even gone up a bit due to the economy and many women realizing this is no time to have a baby, but on television, no main characters ever have abortions. Ever. With the sole exception of the very short lived science fiction show Defying Gravity, which was produced out of the country.

At the time I had not yet seen the episode. I finally got a chance to see it. I thought the episode was terrible. Horrendous, actually. They went with the necessity defense theme that the defense hopes to use in the Tiller case- a defense that failed on Law and Order, and in real life is extremely unlikely to even be allowed by a judge.

But Law and Order added one of their famous twists. In this case, the fetus was born alive because the doctor flubbed the abortion, and the doctor then murdered it by stabbing it with a pair of scissors, thus adding extra justification for the necessity defense. But this born alive argument is a red herring that is very popular with the anti-abortion crowd. They constantly bring it up. It is red meat to them to show that abortion doctors are really just butchers. But it is also a myth. As was much of the episode.

A major plot point involves a nurse who quits working with the doctor and works at a neonatal care facility instead after witnessing the doctor commit murder. The message is that she converted away from the horrible practices of abortion doctors. The reality is that had this baby stabbing actually happened, she would have been required to report it to the police. It would have been a crime. The laws are extremely clear. It is not only not a common practice of late term abortion providers, it is a crime that a doctor could go to jail for.

They throw in plenty of anti-choice zingers while the supposedly pro-choice characters look on with no good comebacks. They keep referring to how people get converted to the anti-abortion side and how America is now anti-abortion. They never show the real pain that the women go through in this difficult situations. As long as the baby is born, its somehow all good.

This episode was so full of bullshit it is hard to separate the elements out into individual steaming piles. They made it seem as if anti-abortion advocates would immediately turn in a radical potential murderer in their midst, but it is well known that that just does not happen. Those advocating murder move freely through anti-abortion groups. I am not aware of a single instance where an anti-abortion group has turned in a member to authorities for advocating violence and murder.  

They promote the ridiculous notion that once a woman has a baby, she becomes anti-abortion. Sixty-percent of abortions are by women who already have children.  The tough as nails female attorney suddenly converts to being anti-abortion in a completely unrealistic scene. They have another late term abortion doctor presented as a villain. Doctors who perform abortions risk their lives every day because they believe women should have a choice and control over their own bodies. They provide what they believe is a necessary service- a service that is constitutionally protected, and for that, they receive death threats, their property is attacked, they are constantly harassed, and people come along and shoot them in the head in church. I did not see any sympathetic portrayal of a doctor who performs abortions. All of them in this episode were villains.

Detective Bernard is anti-abortion because his mother threw her self down a flight of stairs to induce an abortion, causing him to be born two months premature. Forget about how expensive that premature birth would have been- lets focus on how she could have been so despairing and yet all she had to do was have the baby and miraculously everything turns out great. But what if his mother was so despairing she threw herself down a flight of stars to avoid having sex with his father, thus causing him never to have been born. Maybe he should also support women having no choice about saying no to sex.

We are supposed to be sympathetic to the murderer because he is trying to save the life of a fetus that has been diagnosed with severe Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome- an incurable condition that can lead to life-long pain, and require round the clock care- something the episode makes clear won’t exactly be covered by their health insurance since the single woman’s father feels he can handle it if he gets three jobs.

There is extremely maudlin testimony by a woman who decided to go through with the birth other seriously ill child, and she talked about how wonderful the experience was to be with that child in the few hours before it died. Okay, fine, I am glad she had that choice. But I imagine that would be a situation very difficult for the majority of women to handle. Especially when it is not a peaceful death, but a short life filled with horrible pain. Women should have the choice not to have to go through a birth only to watch their baby die before their eyes.

The episode was titled Dignity. A better title would have been Indignant, the reaction from pro-choice viewers across the country who were appalled at this attempt to paint the murder of Dr. Tiller as if there were two sides to the story. There is only one. Scott Roeder is a vile murderer, and he was inspired by the violent rhetoric of the anti-abortion movement. Maybe the next doctor murderer can claim to have been inspired by Law and Order.

Sex Science Sunday

Here we are with another Sex Science Sunday, where we look at all the latest in sex science and research.

What do we really know about the teens who get pregnant? Not as much as we thought, according to a new study by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unwanted Pregnancy. Their conclusion was that the majority of teens at risk of unwanted pregnancy are not from low income and/or single parent families. Only 28 percent of those who report having given birth or fathered a child as a teen lived in families with incomes below the federal poverty line. So teen pregnancy is definitely a middle class issue, and having inadequate sex education in school has been shown to be part of the problem.

I’m sure you’ve heard the old joke about what women find sexiest on men. The answer is an apron while he does the dishes. Maybe not completely off the mark, but an interesting study published in the Journal of Family Issues found that husbands and wives who report spending more time on household chores also report busier sex lives than those who spend less time on housework. Now, before you use this to try and prove to your spouse that doing housework is an aphrodisiac, there are other ways to interpret the data. It probably has more to do with overall energy levels. When you have the energy to do housework along with a job, you also may find the energy to schedule more sex. People who are exhausted by their jobs or work very long hours are probably going to have less energy for both household tasks and sex. One sad conclusion from the study- despite the fact that most women now work full time, they still do twice as much work at home as men do.

I remember reading a religious tract that talked about oral sex being something so disgusting that even animals don’t do it. Tell that to my cat. He is constantly trying to lick his girlfriend’s pussy. And he gets a slightly crazed look on his face when he does. The exact same argument has been used against gay sex, although we know that it is extremely common in the animal kingdom. Fellatio is a different story, though. We know that it is common for Bonobos, our nearest primate genetically speaking. We don’t see it outside of primates, though. But scientists have discovered a fruit bat where the females lick the genitals of the male fruit bats. It apparently helps them keep their erection, and provides extra lubrication. When the fruit bats use fellatio, intercourse lasts twice as long. Scientists are studying it to better understand the evolutionary advantages of the practice.

This study from the University of British Columbia is a little sad for Mitch Hedberg. In a test they showed sexy videos and the least sexy comedian they could find- Mitch Hedberg. Hedberg died in 2005, so he probably won’t take offense, and his comedy did contribute to science. The study was to see how well men could control their sexual responses. The men were told to control their responses to the videos, and as you might expect, most were able to control their mental and physical responses. The study found that the men who were best able to control their response to the pornographic videos were also able to control their response to Mitch Hedberg. Men who were more easily excited were less able to regulate; while guys who tended to be sexually inhibited because of performance issues were better able to prevent having an erection. Frankly, I do not know that this study tells us anything particularly interesting about sexual response, but it does tell us something important about comedy. Get your audience sexually turned on first, and they’ll laugh their asses off at your jokes. That is breakthrough science for those of us who try to make people laugh, and also explains why those horrible burlesque comics were able to get a response from the audiences. They were already turned on.

Discovery Health had a show on unusual sexual diseases last week called Strange Sex. One of the conditions involves being allergic to someone else’s semen, called seminal plasma hypersensitivity. This was quite a problem for a young newlywed couple, who after being married stopped using condoms. Their unprotected sex proved to be extremely painful for her. Maybe using a non-barrier form of birth control before marriage might be a good idea- or at least swallowing. We also know that women can react positively to the chemical effects of semen. Semen has been shown to be a mood elevator. Condoms are a great tool for people in high risk situations, but for committed couples, they might want to explore some non-barrier forms of birth control. What is really sad about this couple is that she works she works in a Catholic school and had to sign a contract that forbid her to use any artificial means of reproduction- so she can’t get pregnant. No place of employment, religious or not, should be able to control your reproductive rights. The good news is that once they find out through this special that she had sex before marriage and used birth control, they will probably fire her- and they will be able to have the baby  she really wants- assuming they can afford it with her out of work.

Other conditions featured on the show included sexominia, or having sex in your sleep with no recollection if it when you wake up. They also covered Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder, where the genitals are constantly aroused- a condition much less fun than you might think.

They also covered someone with sex addiction. What made this different from all of the other conditions? The others all have scientific sounding names and are recognized by the scientific and medical community. Guess what? Sex addiction does not have a fancy name because it is not an actual condition recognized by the scientific community. Yes, there are people who have sexual problems and compulsive behaviors, but calling them sex addicts is fairly meaningless on a diagnostic level because sex addiction has no specific recognized definition. It can be anything you want to call it. By some sex addiction promoting organization standards, I could be labeled a sex addict.  As could porn stars, sexual performers, swingers, and many others who are just fine thank you.

Their example is of a sex therapist who had to have sex every hour. Sounds like she is really in the wrong profession. A bit too much temptation there. What her real condition might be could prove interesting and illuminating, as it seems unusual even amongst  those with issues of sexual compulsion. Calling her a sex addict, though, teaches us very little.