The Jeff Booth Show

Internet Radio with Pictures

Show Transcripts

July 15th, 2007

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Jeff@eroticuniversity.com

(818) 613-9248

Political News

Former Surgeon General Dr. Richard Carmona testified to Congress this week that Bush administration political appointees censored his speeches and kept him from speaking publicly about important medical issues. This included muzzling him on the science on embryonic stem cell research, contraceptives and his concerns about the effectiveness of  "abstinence-only" sex education. Compared to past Surgeon Generals, his tenure was marked by a remarkable amount of political interference and censorship. According to Carmona,  "Anything that doesn't fit into the political appointees' ideological, theological or political agenda is ignored, marginalized or simply buried". Joined by past Attorneys General, they asked Congress to depoliticize the office. Bush has a better idea. Two days later began the hearings for his choice of Surgeon General, James Hosinger, who was our past choice as a Whacko of the Week. They will have no need to censor him, since he seems to share the administrations respect for science, the same respect that science received during the Dark Ages, the same respect for science that sent Galileo to prison, and the same respect for science that encourages people today to believe that the earth is only 6,000 years old. It’s the same kind of respect you have for your sister when you whore her out against her will.

It may seem like we complain only about Republicans, but democrats can be just as bad on issues of sexuality. Case in point- California Democratic Assembly Member Chuck Calderon, who introduced AB1551. This bill would add an 8% tax on gross revenues, taxing items sold by sex shops, adult movies on satellite, and pay-per-view movies featuring unprotected sex or X-rated acts in a public place. There would even be a new bureaucracy established just to manage the new tax. SO why the tax? According to Calderone, he’s not concerned with morality, he just wants to raise money to fight crime and property devaluation in neighborhoods affected by X-rated sales or shows. How in the world does my buying a dildo lower anyone’s property values. In what possible reality is my watching a pay per view movie in my home going to increase crime in my neighborhood. And where the hell are these x-rated sex acts in public places cause I’d like to see them? I don’t think Calderon could get any stupider if he repeatedly jammed an ice pick into his frontal cortex. And now you are going to hear me say something I almost never say- high five to the Republicans for vowing to kill this bill because they oppose new taxes. It may be for the wrong reason, but it is the right thing to do..

Citizens for Community Values (CCV) is calling for a federal investigation of LodgeNet Entertainment Corp., claiming that the adult movies the company supplies to hotel rooms are obscene. They will be meeting formally with the Justice Department to discuss the issue. The interesting question would be whose community standards would apply, since typically people from the community are not the ones staying in the hotel- it is people from other communities. Adult movies in hotels are extremely lucrative. Just ask Presidential candidate Mitt Romney, who for ten years sat on the board at Marriott hotels and apparently never raised any objection. Lodgenet is the provider for Marriott, and CCV calls Marriott a major pornographer. Romney, in a speech at Pat Robertson's Regent University, bizarrely linked pornography with mass murder when he said, “"Pornography and violence poison our music and movies and TV and video games. The Virginia Tech shooter, like the Columbine shooters before him, had drunk from this cesspool."  I can’t wait for the next mass murderer to claim he couldn’t help himself because he watched porn at the Marriott.

Why was there an uptick in abortions in Minnesota? You might call it a statistical blip. Or it might be because of their strong abstinence only education, which studies show increases the likelihood of abortion because teens don’t learn about contraception but still have sex. Or, you could explain it the way Minnesota Citizens Concerned for Life did. It was all because Planned Parenthood opened two mall stores targeting young women with scented oils and candles. Sure, these two centers provided family planning services to make abortion less likely in the future, and did not provide abortion services. And sure, 70% of the abortions were a result of women not using contraception. But that just shows the insidiousness of Planned Parenthood’s evil plan.  You sucker them into trying contraception, and that is so much fun, the next thing they’ll want to try is one of those trendy and fun abortions.

Just before being outed by a Hustler magazine investigation, David Vitter, the U.S. Senator representing Louisiana came out publicly to apologize for the serious sins in his past. What Hustler discovered was that his phone number was on the phone list of the DC Madam. It also just came out, according to Jeanette Maier, known as the Canal Street Madam, that he was also a regular customer of her establishment, spending $300 an hour for their services. What Vitter will probably not do, though, is follow his own advice. Vitter replaced Rep. Bob Livingstone, who abruptly resigned after Hustler exposed his numerous affairs. Vitter said at the time that Clinton should follow Livingstone’s lead and resign on moral grounds. No word on Vitter’s resignation, so apparently, paying for it is less morally objectionable than doing it for free. . And Vitter is an expert on morality. He was a sponsor in 2003 of a constitutional amendment that would prohibit gay marriage or giving gays any of the benefits or protections of marriage. He opposes gay adoption. He voted against reducing teen pregnancy through education and contraception. He opposed international family planning aid. His wife also seems to have had a change of heart. During the Lewinsky affair, she criticized Hillary for not leaving her husband, and stated that if David ever cheated, she would leave him, carrying his severed penis. She’s still with him, and apparently has not gone off half cocked. Flynt claims to have files on 19 other sexual hypocrites in high office.

In Florida, State Rep. Bob Allen was arrested for solicitation for prostitituion when he offered to give a blowjob to an undercover officer in a restroom for $20. Yes, he was the one asking for money, and at a bargain rate. While this picture on his official state website is 10 years old, this picture of him today explains we he could only get $20. To be fair, running for office in Florida is very expensive and they constantly have to raise money. Interestingly, and this is not made up, his official State website lists his only recreational interest as water sports. Allen was planning to serve as a House co-chair for Senator John McCain's presidential campaign, but apparently he blew it.

All over the country, violent lesbian gangs are attacking innocent civilians, raping young girls, and recruiting girls as young as 10 to become lesbians and join their gangs. They are literally Lesbians gone wild. If you see a group of three or more women walking together towards you, the safest thing is to cross the street. That is what you would have been lead to believe, anyway, if you were a listener of the O’reilly factor. After this breathless initial report, bill O’Reilly then went on to interview "Fox News crime analyst" Rod 007 Wheeler. That really is his nickname. Wheeler reported on a national network of pink pistol-packing crazed lesbians. He said that in just the Washington area alone, there were some 150 lesbian gangs. Wheeler was forced this week to make a decidedly half-hearted apology when it was revealed by the Southern Poverty Law Center that he was a member of a church with a strong anti-gay agenda and that his “facts” were almost entirely unsubstantiated. Call them, “made up”. Still, despite almost every single one of his facts being completely wrong, and without a single law enforcement agency agreeing with him, Wheeler still insists that there are dangerous lesbian gangs out there.  In that spirit, we would like to report on an alarming new trend- heavily armed Conservative Republican gangs are attacking liberals on the streets, beating them senseless with tattered and soiled copies of the bill of rights, forcing them to call Bush the greatest president ever, and raping innocent young men and women, forcing them to have sex in the missionary position, with the lights off. I forget- is the O’Reilly Factor a parody of the Colbert Report, or the reverse, boy, its Hard to tell these days.

Science

Viagra is not an aphrodisiac. It does not create desire, it simply facilitates an erection. Nor has it proven to be all that helpful for women. The most famous aphrodisiac, Spanish Fly is made from ground up beetles, and can cause an itching sensation, but it does not increase arousal and has the unfortunate side effect of possible death. Of course, no one sells actual Spanish fly. It, along with other marketed aphrodisiacs, come in bottles with labeling such as "contains a well known and potent placebo", or made from a "simulative" extract”,  or other fancy ways of saying sugar pill. In fact, there is no such thing as a true aphrodisiac on the market. Now. Coming soon to a pharmacy near you, though, may be the real deal, with the rather unsexy name of bremelanotide. It is a spray administered nasally, and it could enter Phase 3 testing as early as August of this year. This is the final stage of FDA testing. It works in as little as 15 minutes, and seems to create in both men and women a strong desire for sex along with genital warmth, tingling and throbbing. And the good news is that since you can both use it, you can both keep up with each other. If it lives up to expectations, it stands to become one of the most popular drugs ever developed. And, of course, it will be the final nail in the coffin of civilization, according to religious conservatives. But man, it will be one fun nail.  Still- with a name like bremelanotide, it really needs a catchy slogan. Something from the world of traditional advertising perhaps, such as hair care products- Bremalanotide- say goodbye to limp, lifeless and unmanageable.  Since both men and women report having sex multiple times a night, they might borrow the old Pringles ad slogan, “Once you pop the fun don't stop.” Or, the classic, When it absolutely, positively has to be there overnight.

An Italian doctor was able to build a vagina for two women who were born without them, using their own cells to grow vaginal tissue in the lab. No mention of whether the procedure could be used on men, so that they would no longer have to say that it is anatomically impossible when told to go fuck themselves.

A new Canadian survey reports that 8% of dreams are sexual. It also found that men tend to have imaginary partners in dreams, while women tend to have sex with real people: current and past partners and celebrities. Much like in real life. Now if only they could develop a technology that let’s you skip to the good parts.

When looking at porn, what is the first part of a body a man looks at? Her face, according to a new study published in the journal Hormones and Behaviour. Using eye tracking technology, they also learned that women tend to focus more on the sex, while men lingered on the face. They theorize that the main way men may judge sexual arousal in women is though looking at their faces, while women need only look to see if he has wood.

Scientists in Japan have found a way to mix fat from the stomache or buttox with stem cells, and inject them into the breast to increase bust size. The procedure takes about an hour. Injecting just fat into the breasts does not work because the fat is simply reabsorbed, but adding the stem cells actually encourages growth. As documented in Chemistry and Industry Magazine, it could be a real boone for mastectomy patients, and might even eventually be used for more natural bust enhancement. It is an amazing procedure, as they have found a way to remove fat from where it is not wanted, and put it in the only acceptable place for it in our culture. You never hear a woman ask, honey, does this dress make my breasts look fat?

Two UCLA researchers spent four years on a study and came up with an astonishing conclusion: Men work out at gyms because women are sexually attracted to muscular men. Their work was published in the latest issue of Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. You can overdo it, as they found that women rated overly muscular men as less trustworthy. The study also found that muscular men were more than twice as likely to have had three or more partners in their life as the less muscle bound. That doesn’t impress me, since that can also be a factor of time. I want to know how much more likely they were to have had three or more partners at the same time. That’s what would make working out really worth it.

Entertainment

Full frontal male nudity in a PG movie? Yes, but it’s a cartoon, and the only one getting naked is 10 year old Bart Simpson. Homer dares him to ride his skateboard naked, and the ride does not turn out so well for him. The camera doesn’t blink, or rather, the animators don’t, as there is a brief glimpse of little Bartster.

HBO may be taking sexuality even further. The new HBO series Tell Me You Love Me is said to depict the most sexually explicit scenes ever shown in a television series. Nicknamed  “the pornography show” during production, it features Jane Alexander, Tim DeKay and Ally Walker. And nudity and sex. One thing it does not have, though, is infidelity. The married couples on the show are all fully committed to monogamy. The show premieres in September.

Showtime takes just the opposite tact with its Californication, starring David Duchovney as a hard drinking writer who spends his evenings with one night stands. It is also said to push the sexual envelope. It premieres August 13th, but non-Showtime subscribers can see the pilot episode through Netflix.

My first real acting role was Puck in a Midsummer Night’s Dream, and I wore tights. Then I did Romeo and Juliet, again in tights. The Washington Shakespeare Company's production of Macbeth lets the actors be much more comfortable. They wear nothing at all. And all ten actors stay nude on stage the entire time, which is easier to do when there are no costume changes. It does have to change the meaning of some of the famous Macbeth lines, though, such as, “Shall he dwindle, peak, and pine.”  Hopefully not in front of the audience. Or, “What are these so wither'd and so wild in their attire” That probably really resonates with the audience. And some of the male members of the audience who reportedly have a little trouble with all the naked hairy manflesh can take comfort in the line, “Present fears are less than horrible imaginings.” 

Now that strip tease queen Dita Von Tease is back on the market after her divorce from Marilyn manson, she finds that many men are surprised that she likes vanilla sex just as much as the next girl. Of course, she’s also into bondage and spanking. Sure, the vanilla is fine, but what a lot of them are really interested in is the toppings.

Sexvestigation: Sex Dragnet

My name is Sgt. William Gladney. I carry a badge. And a gun. And another gun strapped to my ankle.

It was the day shift. I was working vice/narcotics. It was a hot muggy Monday morning in the city of Jackson. Local residents had tipped us to a dealer that had moved into a storefront in their neighborhood. We decided to go undercover to investigate.

We entered the store. The squinty eyed man behind the counter was named James Henderson .He was the typical low-life criminal, making his living off of the desperation of his fellow citizens. I approached him cautiously.

Henderson: “Hi, welcome to Secrets . What can I do you for?”

Sgt. Gladney: "I’m here to buy a sex toy. A dirty, discusting perverted sex toy.”

Henderson: “Are you looking to buy a toy for yourself, or for a wife or girlfriend?”

 Sgt. Gladney: “Do I look like the kind of man who would buy a woman a sex toy?”

Henderson: “No sir, not at all. I woulda had you pegged right off.”

Sgt. Gladney: “Just give me that one over there.”

Henderson: “Ah, the Anal Dominator. Moment you walked in I pegged you as an Anal Dominator sort of guy. Very popular with our gay customers.”

Sgt. Gladney: “Uh-huh. And, give me that one.”

Henderson: “The Pussy Pounder 3000. You won’t find anything more powerful.”

Sgt. Gladney: “Officer, arrest this man.”

Henderson: “What?!!!”

We had the small fry, but we were going after bigger game. We needed the top man.  We made Henderson make the call. It was not long before the head man of this operation arrived.

Rosenthal:  “I’m Harry Rosenthal, I own this place. What’s going on? My clerk called and said there was a problem.”

Sgt. Gladney: " There’s a problem. Its people like you that think you can flaunt the law. It’s a crime in Missisippi to sell devices used for sexual stimulation of the genitals, and I’m assuming the posterior as well. Or perhaps you didn’t know that."

Rosenthal: “They’re just sex toys”

Sgt. Gladney:" Uh-huh. But once a man inserts this into his rectum, what’s to keep him from losing all interest in normal vaginal sex?  And what woman will want a man after she’s had this? No sir, that leads us down the road to losing interest in normal sexual relations, which means no more children, no more family, and no more future. Your selfish sexual hedonism will bring our nation to its knees, but I guess that’s something you never bothered to think about. Cuff him and take him away."

I instructed my partner to start boxing up the evidence.

Officer: “Golly, there’s over 70 boxes here of massage creams, lotions, and I don’t even know what that is.”

Sgt. Gladney: “Don’t look in the boxes. Just pack ‘em up. I need to get some fresh air."

Officer: Where you going Sgt Gladney?”

Sgt. Gladney: “There’s a gun store down the street. Sale on semi-automatics. Nephew has a birthday coming up.

The story you have just heard is true. None of the names were changed

Whacko of the Week

Comedian Robin Williams apparently knows more about molesting priests than William Donohue, who heads the Catholic League. Donohue was incensed at Williams’ hilarious riff on pedophile priests on the Tonight show while promoting his new movie, License to Wed. Donahue stated, “Williams suggests that most molesting priests are pedophiles, when in fact they are homosexuals. But to make a joke about gay priests could get him into trouble. So it’s better to lie. This is justice – Hollywood style.” Donahue is referring to his claim that 60 percent of the children molested by priests are over the age of 14. Except that two major studies commissioned by America’s bishops in 2004 show that over half of the children claiming that they were molested were between the ages of 11 and 14. And twenty percent were girls. Which means that his statistics claiming to blame child molestation on homosexuals were just pulled out of his ass.

Technically, a pedophile is someone attracted to prepubescent children.  That leaves roughly 30 percent of male children who were adolscents when they were molested by priests. People attracted to teenagers are called  ephebophiles. The common term for them is not homosexuals, as Donahue claims, but child molestors, which covers anyone molesting children of any gender. Homosexuals tend to be attracted to masculine qualities, which don’t tend to be pronounced in young boys. That is why, according to almost all experts, that the majority of child molesters identify as heterosexuals, not homosexuals.

Not only does Donohue blame Priestly pedophilia on homosexuals, he also blames the victims. Directing his comments to disgraced Rep. Mark Foley, who claimed that a priest molested him as a boy, Donahue said, “Why didn't you just smack the clergyman in the face? After all, most 15-year-old teenage boys wouldn't allow themselves to be molested. So why did you?" Yes, it’s the 15 year old,  in the face of the adult  representatives of god, who is at fault. Don’t you go to hell fro smacking a priest. That is literally priest bashing, something Donahue complains about frequently.

The Catholic League that Donohue leads professes to be "the nation's largest Catholic civil rights organization, defending the right of Catholics -- lay and clergy alike -- to participate in American public life without defamation or discrimination. Apparently, the Donohue approach to doing this is through defaming and discriminating against others.

Donohue does not limit his bigotry and ignorance to homosexuality. In an appearance on MSNBC’ Scarborough Country, he  said that some actors were nothing more than harlots who will do anything for a buck, and stated that "If you asked" some Hollywood actors "to sodomize their own mother in a movie, they would do so, and they would do it with a smile on their face." I suspect this bizarre statement has more to do with Donohues twisted fantasies than anything in the real world, but his hatred of actors is quite intense.

But that is nothing compared  to how he feels about Jews. Doesn’t like the Jews at all. Maybe because he sees them as the pimps in his mother/son prostitute actor fantasies. Again on Scarborough Country, he said, “"Hollywood is controlled by secular Jews who hate Christianity in general and Catholicism in particular. It's not a secret, OK?” After being criticized, he quoted the respected Jewish publication the Forward, where it said “Jews run Hollywood.’ What it actually said was that to say that the Jews run Hollywood smacks of anti-semitism. Nto exactly an accurate quotation.

As expected, gays are also on his hate list, where somehow his own homophobia makes him the victim. In a country where hate and prejudice are common experiences for homosexuals, he stated "The gay community has yet to apologize to straight people for all the damage that they have done."  He also said, "Name for me a book publishing company in this country, particularly in New York, which would allow you to publish a book which would tell the truth about the gay death style."

Here is another bizarre quote “Hollywood likes anal sex. They like to see the public square without nativity scenes. I like families. I like children. They like abortions. I believe in traditional values and restraint. They believe in libertinism. We have nothing in common. But you know what? The culture war has been ongoing for a long time. Their side has lost.” You, and we all love seeing those great Bill Donahue movies now that Hollywood has lost the culture wars.

When interviewed about the movie Brokeback Mountain, he refused to call it by name and said, “Gay cowboy doesn't interest me. I am going to go see King Kong. I suspect the people who make these kind of movies, though -- like gay cowboy -- would go to see a movie called The Gay Gorilla. But that's the difference between Hollywood and mainstream.”  

He has a long history of criticizing things he has never seen. He led protests against the Kevin Smith film Dogma without seeing it. He railed aginst the HBO series Lucky Louie for being barbaric, blasephemous, and obscene, but then later admitted he had never seen an episode. He called for a federal child pornography  investigation over the non-explicit  rape scene in the film HoundDog of 12 year old Dakota Fanning, another film he did not see, but he says little about the actual child rape perpetrated by his church, which, apparently, he also does not see.

He complained about Delaware removing the two year statute of limitations for child molestors. In 2002, he opposed New York legislation that would have required the Catholic Church  to report child molestors to the police. They were exempt. Instead, he proposed legislation that would have redefined the definition of child abuse to include teenagers having consensual sex. Laws like this have passed other place, and have resulted in both partners, young teenagers being arrested and prosecuted for molesting each other, and facing being labled as child molestors for the rest of their lives. In his twisted world, children are the child molestors.

Donohue continues to be a lunatic quote factory, spewing out bigotry, hate, and fractured facts. If the Catholic Church can so effectively shut up dissidents, as Pope benedict has been so willing to do, why don’t they shut the foul hate filled mouth of Bill Donohue?  In the mystery cloaked world of Catholicism, that is another enduring mystery.