The Jeff Booth Show

Internet Radio with Pictures

Show Transcripts

May 3rd, 2009

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Jeff@eroticuniversity.com

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This is the first time ever that we have had two stories we’ve been covering collide in such an interesting fashion. SO, we are doing a sexvestigation on the subject with our current report- The Perfect Storm. There are a lot of surprises. Our roundup of sex in politics includes the most obscure sexual terms ever read into the Congressional  record, and Georgia’s well known bestiality participant running for governor. In sex and entertainment, we look at the profusion of creepy sexual ads on television lately, Kelly McGillis surprising sexual announcement, and the first porn star to crossover and star in a  film from a major director.

Sexvestigation:

The Perfect Storm

Two storms are coming together. The clouds have been gathering the past couple of weeks over two stories we’ve been covering. Separate and distinct, last Thursday they collided to form the perfect storm. A perfect storm of stupidity and ridiculousness.

One of the stories involves Miss California, Carrie Prejean (pray john), who made headlines with her strong anti-gay marriage stance in the Miss USA pageant. After staunchly defending herself as just someone expressing her personal opinion when asked, she has now hired a Christian PR firm, the same one that represents mega-church homophobe Rick Warren. And she joined forces with the National Coalition for Marriage.

Yes, the same crazies who made what may be the most parodied commercial of all time, the ridiculous Gathering Storm video that equates gay marriage with other natural disasters. You can hear our parody of that on the April 19th show.  The National Organization for Marriage will be using her name to solicit donations. And she let them use her in their new commercial.

But lets’ segue for a moment to look at NOM. I was surprised to hear that science fiction writer and prominent Mormon Orson Scott Card sits on their board. I am not really a fan of his science fiction books, but I had no idea what a raging homophobe he is. He has written extensively on the desperate threat that gays and not just gay marriage pose to America. He writes that homosexuality stems from the fact that teenage boys will fuck anything that moves and some of them just never grow out of it.

Here are some choice Card quotes: “Laws against homosexual behavior should remain on the books...to be used when necessary to send a clear message that those who flagrantly violate society's regulation of sexual behavior cannot be permitted to remain as acceptable, equal citizens.”

Oh, but it gets crazier. “How long before married people answer the dictators thus: Regardless of law, marriage has only one definition, and any government that attempts to change it is my mortal enemy. I will act to destroy that government and bring it down, so it can be replaced with a government that will respect and support marriage, and help me raise my children in a society where they will expect to marry in their turn. Biological imperatives trump laws. American government cannot fight against marriage and hope to endure. If the Constitution is defined in such a way as to destroy the privileged position of marriage, it is that insane Constitution, not marriage, that will die.” SO he wants to destroy the country over gay people getting married. Very patriotic. And I guess he forgot that we live in a democracy- where the people are the government.

NOM president Maggie Gallagher is herself a piece of work. She testified as an independent expert before Congress in 2005 in favor of the Bush administration’s healthy marriage initiatives without revealing that the Bush administration was actually paying her tens of thousands of dollars. She was the cheerleader behind much of the misinformation in the Prop 8 battle in California- trotting out asinine statements like "Gays are the intolerant ones”, "It's unfair to target religion" and claiming that gay marriage would lead to "livelihoods threatened, artists blacklisted, property defaced, worship services blocked, and even some physical attacks directed at ordinary people simply because they say marriage means a man and a woman." That’s right- its not gays who have been targeted with hate, discrimination, and violence- its the poor fundamentalists and Mormons who want them to just go away.

So this is the organization that Carrie has linked up with- the folks she is now associating with. The National Organization for Marriage describes the new ad this way: "No Offense," (is) the next ad in NOM's $1.5 million national ad campaign... What happens when a young California beauty pageant contestant is asked "do you support same-sex marriage?" She is attacked viciously for having the courage to speak up for her truth and her values. But Carrie's courage inspired a whole nation and a whole generation of young people because she chose to risk the Miss USA crown rather than be silent about her deepest moral values. "No Offense" calls gay marriage advocates to account for their unwillingness to debate the real issue: gay marriage has consequences.

Yes, it does. It makes families. It provides stability for children. It helps couples when one has a serious illness and winds up in the hospital. There are a lot of consequences. Just none of the insane ones that Carrie and her NOM buddies dream of.

I saw the new ad, and the biggest disappointment is that it is nowhere near as funny as the first one. It is no more accurate, though. They use a clip of the president of the Human Rights Campaign, Joe Solmonese, testifying that the anti-gay advocates are bigots and  trying to deny gays these rights by lying and misrepresenting- probably the only true thing in the ad. In response to the ad, Joe said “As far as my cameo, I appreciate them emphasizing my point that when debating the merits of this issue they only have lies on which to rely.”

The jokes in this ad are much more subtle. The ad says “Some of the nation’s foremost scholars warn that gay marriage can bring widespread conflicts for individuals, small businesses and legal organizations. Two quotes appear over a letter- the first “Will create widespread and unnecessary legal conflict”, the second, “effects would be devastating”. None of this is attributed or translated into English so we know what the hell they mean. But the joke is easy to miss. The letter in the background is letterhead, with a name at the top. The name is Douglas Laycock. Really. Douglas Laycock. He is a real law professor and an expert on church-state issues and of course, they quote him out of context. He actually wrote that gay marriage without robust religious accommodation would create conflict- and the kicker is that he supports gay marriage. So misrepresenting what he says reinforces the clip they use of Joe Solmonese where he essentially calls them liars. See how subtle the joke is? You could easily miss it.

Actually, you probably missed the entire ad. It was only on Youtube for a few hours before Perez Hilton forced it off due to unauthorized use of a clip from his Internet show. And with all of the footage from the Miss USA pageant, I am amazed that they did not send out the lawyers as well. I can’t imagine that they got permission to use any of the clips they used, but you know- NOM is fighting for morality, and sometimes you have to sacrifice a few ethics in the name or morality.

People like Carrie Prejean can never clearly explain what they are protecting traditional marriage from. And as a long time happily married heterosexual (married to a bisexual woman by the way, so I stand very strongly for gay and bisexual rights), I really don’t need her help protecting my marriage. Its fine, thank you. Carrie, you aren’t  even married yourself, and at 21, you don’t have a fucking clue about anything.

Right after the pageant, you went on and on about how your answer was just your opinion, and I agree you should have the right to your opinion.  Carrie, once you become politically active in trying to use the law to deny other people rights, it ceases to just be your opinion. It ceases to be just your opinion when you want to force that opinion down everyone else’s throat. You are now an advocate. And we can attack you for your narrow minded bigotry because your bull shit opinions have consequences.  And stop whining about people calling you stupid as you did in your press conference. It’s just an observation, not a criticism.

Carrie has been all over the television. On CNN, Carrie said “I went with my gut, I went with my heart, and I stood up for my lord.” You know she doesn’t go with her brain. I imagine they are barely casual acquaintances. And she announced on "The Today Show" Thursday that she's going to DC to lobby against gay marriage.

On Today she said- “"The National Organization for Marriage basically just respects, um, you know, marriages and people who support it. That's what I'm here to do today, protect traditional marriage."

On Greta Van Susteren she refused to say where she stood on gay adoption or civil unions. She just kept saying the same thing over and over no matter how Greta asked- “I just support traditional marriage.” I am assuming she means traditional marriage since the 1950s when we moved away, at least in this country, from arranged marriages, and not the widespread traditional form of marriage that allows multiple wives.

And we can’t forget about her big Thursday press conference, sponsored by the National Organization for Marriage. In it, she made dumb people look smart in comparison. She flatly, and amateurishly read from prepared remarks stumbling over the words, barely looking up at the audience, as if some deeper part of her actually had a sense of shame. She said- “If we don’t bring men and women together, children won’t have mothers and fathers.” Actually, Carrie, heterosexual men and women seem to come together just fine without your help. Men and women are going to continue to get married, have sex, and have children, although not always in that order.

Then she said- “I do not want to raise my own children in a world where this traditional view of marriage is considered hateful or discriminatory.” Well, Carrie, since your view is considered hateful and discriminatory because you want to impose it on everyone rather than just your self, I have a simple solution for you. Don’t have children. Sure, you’d probably be depriving the gene pool of some good looks, but that is far outweighed by the other things you’d contribute. I guess your other option is to find another world. Good luck with that one. You might find some Muslim countries more in tune with your beliefs, and it will seem like another world, although they aren’t on board for the whole Jesus thing.

Carrie kept talking about how she represented the State of California, both as Miss California and because in a very, very close election filled with lies and distortions partially provided by the same folks she is now cuddling up to, a tiny majority voted the same way she did. Carrie- you don’t represent California. You didn’t win a seat in Congress. You are a fucking beauty pageant winner. You won for your looks.   

And even there she is a phoney. At least her tits are. This story blew me away when I heard it. According to a report from Access Hollywood, “Shanna Moakler, Co-Executive Director of the Miss California Organization, has confirmed the group behind the pageant paid for Miss California Carrie Prejean’s breast implants, weeks before she competed in Miss USA.” I understand that beauty pageants by their very nature are not really progressive, but breast implants? Isn’t that cheating? Come on. Why not throw in liposuction, and plastic surgery while you are at it? Completely reconstruct her. We can make her better, stronger, more beautiful. Too bad there is no plastic surgery for the brain. The Miss California pageant people are not thrilled about the controversy. They’d love to talk to Carrie about it, but she does not return their phone calls. They just get referred to her new Christian publicist.

Finally, pageant officials had had enough. In an official statement on the matter, they said: "In the entire history of the Miss USA, no reigning title holder has so readily committed her face and voice to a more divisive or polarizing issue. We are deeply saddened Carrie Prejean has forgotten her platform of the Special Olympics, her commitment to all Californians, and solidified her legacy as one that goes beyond the right to voice her beliefs and instead reveals her opportunistic agenda."

So pageant leaders are concerned that she ignores them and does whatever she wants. Had a nude lesbian pictorial of her been discovered, of course, she would have lost her crown in a New York minute.

So Carrie will continue doing what Jesus wants her to do, bashing gay marriage, just as she did what Jesus wanted her to do when he told her to get bigger titties to win a beauty pageant. Young and dumb and full of silicone, the fundies have adopted her as a new spokesperson- and she’ll continue to ignore the commitments she made to the pageant and to the Special Olympics to follow her own moral beliefs for an agenda denying other people rights.

Normally I would have the opposite opinion, but in this case, I am glad that the pageant decided to follow their traditional sexist view of women by giving her bigger breasts rather than public speaking lessons. She is really terrible at it, and that makes her less effective at spreading her simple-minded bigotry.

In our previous coverage of this story, I called Perez Hilton out on the nasty things he called her. I am no fan of Perez, but seems like he sort of called it.

News

The big story is that Spector has switched parties and has become a Democrat. What were the Democrats thinking when they accepted this guy? He is essentially a poster child for the NRA. His track record on women is atrocious. Plus he’s going to prison for years. Oh, Arlen, not Phil. That’s even crazier.

The House passed the landmark Hate Crimes bill, and we have a special Sexvestigation about it next week. And I think I really like Congressman Alcee Hastings. Conservatives did whatever they could to derail this bill, which would add gays to the list of protected classes for hate crimes. Hastings was complaining about an amendment put up in the rules committee which he thought was trying to trivialize the process, so he read the amendment on the record- and I am not do as a good a job as he did of pronouncing all of these: “The term sexual orientation as used in this act, or any amendments made by this act, does not include apotemnophilia, asphyxophilia, autogynephilia, coprophilia, exhibitionism, fetishism, frotteurism, gerontosexuality, incest, kleptophilia, klismaphilia, necrophilia, partialism, pedophilia, sexual masochism, sexual sadism, telephone scatalogia, toucherism, transgenderism, transsexual, transvestite, transvestic fetishism, urophilia, voyeurism, or zoophilia." He noted that the author must have spent a lot of time with a dictionary, and said “All I can say is the late-night comedians need to come up there with me sometime so that they can get into the spirit of spuriousness that comes there on certain occasions”.

An admitted mule fucker in Georgia is running for governor. Of course, he says, he stopped doing that after he found the lord. So, what, its just horses now? His name is, and I am really not kidding, his name is Neal Horsley. But this is not some complete unknown.  If you don’t know the name, you may know him from his web site. The "Nuremberg Files" website listed the names, phone numbers and addresses of abortion doctors, and then crossed off the names of the doctors as they were killed. He has lost many law suits and the site was officially shut down. His platform running as the candidate for the Creator's Rights Party is simple- have Georgia secede and go to war against the United States over the abortion issue. He says people have to be willing to die for his cause. Well, not him, but he would gladly sacrifice his own son. Since his entire family including his ex-wife hates him, maybe that is not so much of a sacrifice. He related in an interview with Dylan Otto Krider in the San Jose Examiner how he got into an argument with his adult son over the abortion issue and almost stabbed him with a knife. SO he is ready and willing to have people die in his cause to protect the unborn. So I guess the Justice Department really was out of line pointing out how the increasingly violent far right poses a potential threat. All Horsley wants to do is start a civil war and kill a bunch of people. How could that possibly be a threat?

And in Louisiana, Senator David Vitter faces a challenger in his bid for reelection. Someone without the controversial history of hooking up with hookers in DC and New Orleans. Porn star Stormy Daniels. She’ll be going on a listening tour of the state to help her decide if she really wants to enter the race. Baton Rouge native Stormy will kick off her listening tour of Louisiana with a stop for lunch at The Roux House in Baton Rouge, Tuesday, May 5th at noon. She will meet with Louisiana men and women and listen to the issues and concerns they struggle with everyday.

What the fuck? Oops. Sorry. That was a fleeting expletive. My response to the recent Supreme Court decision on the FCC and fleeting expletives. The court upheld the FCC right to exact huge fines for such fleeting and unplanned moments. SO, say goodbye to actual live television shows. At least on the networks. They just can’t afford the fines, nor do they want to be responsible for subjecting children to the horror and psychological damage caused by hearing words on television that they only otherwise hear on the playground every day.

Rhode Island legislators are hard at work on legislation to outlaw prostitution. Seems the only anti-prostitution law they have on the books forbids it only if it takes place outdoors. Rep. Donald J. Lally, Chair of the House Judiciary Committee, said "It's time we're not the only one out of 50 (states) which hasn't a law against it. I don't think that's what we really want to be known for." No. You should stick with your reputation of being one of the most politically corrupt states in the nation. Much better than being known for your hookers.

Entertainment

The television show House is always interesting, and I have been a fan of Hugh Laurie’s ever since his Blackadder days, where he played the blindingly moronic prince regent. As Blackadder, played by Rowan Atkinson, referred to him, he was “as thick as a whale omelet”.  House is doing something very interesting that I have never seen done realistically on television before- portray the relationship between a heterosexual man and a bisexual woman. Foreman and Thirteen are dating, and in the episode titled House Divided, we see the couple at a strip club looking for a stripper for a bachelor party. And being married to a bisexual women, they hit it dead on. That is what it is like, and it is great that the Foreman character is able to handle her bisexuality. Very rarely is this type of relationship depicted normally or as it really is.

Red Bull is pushing the envelope with their increasingly creepy animated ads. The first was at a nudist beach with a woman lasciviously checking out a guy’s ass and offering him a Red Bull as a kid chases a ball in the background. He takes the drink and promptly flies away, apparently because her sexual aggressiveness was a little inappropriate for a nude beach. Its not sexy- its more creepy and strange. Upping the creepy factor in a following ad, it features a kid giving Red Bull to some pigs, which gives them wings, so when he asks his mother for something and she responds “When pigs fly” he gets his wish. Which is apparently to have his other break the law by providing him with a stripper. Both creepy and illegal.

Burger King one ups them, though, with its bizarre square butts ads to promote their Sponge Bob Squarepants tie-in. It’s a play on Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-a-Lot but this is square butts, instead of big butts. Get it? Square, because Spongebob is square. The big question is, is this really appropriate for kids. Because I think that Burger King guy could give them nightmares. He is definitely creepy.  Of course, kids are going to love the whole square butt thing, and mimick it repeatedly. And the tag line, booty is booty, teaches young people that when they fetishize and objectify a part of a woman’s body, they need to be more open-minded about the tremendous diversity in different body types. So, see, it does have a positive lesson for our kids.

In the current issue of Marie Claire magazine, sex columnist Lauren Iannotti looks at the MILF phenomenon in adult movies. According to sales stats from online retailer SugarDVD, the MILF category is second only to interracial titles in popularity. That surpasses even the barely legal teen category. I guess a lot of men would rather fantasize over adult women rather than pretty but air-headed fantasy girls like Miss California.

Yesterday was the Masturbate-a-thon in San Francsico, an annual event started by Dr. Carol Queen. It featured live performances, volunteer masturbators, and voyeur opportunities. We don’t have all the details yet on this year’s event, but previous events set several records, including  last year’s winner of "Longest Time Spent Masturbating/Male" (and also the World Record Holder in this category)  Masanobu Sato, who masturbated for 9 hours and 33 minutes, the "Longest Time Spent Masturbating/Female",Kitty Kat, who masturbated for 7 hours and 6 minutes, "Most Orgasms/Male" Michael Hariprem with 31 climaxes and set in San Francisco in May 2008, and of course,  the most times news reporters have used the phrase “lending a hand” to describe a single event.

Dr. Drew Pinsky has long been one of my least favorite sex experts. I was glad when he did the Celebrity Rehab series so he’d be less likely to talk about sex. Now he is back on the sex jag with his upcoming VH1 fall series, “Sex Rehab With Dr. Drew.” The series will supposedly clear up many misconceptions about sex addiction. I am hoping that the first one will be that sex is not an addiction- that these sexual issues are actually compulsions and can’t be treated as you would an actual addiction. Whether addiction specialist Pinsky gets that right remains to be seen.

Remember Kelly McGillis? Witness, Top Gun, the Accussed. She retired from acting to raise her kids, returning in 2007. At 51, she is a little older, and her hair is graying. She is single, and looking. But not for a man. She came out as a lesbian this past week. She was married to men, but always identified as lesbian. She struggled with it, saying "I had a lot of things happen that convinced me that God was punishing me because I was gay." McGillis was attacked and raped in her apartment in 1982 when she was a young actress working in New York. That inspired her to take the role as the lawyer in the Accused, turning down the lead that went to Jodie Foster because the role just hit too close to home.

In porn news, I did not see this coming. The first porn star to actually crossover and star in a film from a major director. Its Sasha Grey. She stars in Steven Soderbergh’s The Girlfriend Experience. Its about a $2000 an hour call girl juggling her professional life and a boyfriend. I have seen clips and Sasha does a terrific job. And here is the most surprising part. Despite the casting of a porn star, and despite the subject matter, the film has no sex and almost no nudity.

Is Deep Throat in the public domain? That may be decided by a court if Arrow and VCX don’t settle their dispute over the rights to distribution of the classic porn film. VCX started distributing Deep Throat, supposedly as retribution over Arrow’s distribution of classic films "Debbie Does Dallas" and "The Devil in Miss Jones." The actual ststus of all three films is in question. VCX’s claims to the rights are based on a bizarre legal theory. VCX is arguing that the predecessor companies of both VCX and Arrow originated during an era when the mob controlled the pornography industry, and that today VCX has a "mob provenance" claim of ownership over the old films. That’s a new one on me, but since it is unclear whether the original Deep Throat and other adult films of the time were released with the proper copyright, it may be moot if they are found to be in the public domain. Both sides have a lot to lose with a court case, and lovers of classic adult films have a lot to gain at their expense.

And finally, the film Naked Ambition, an R-Rated Look At an X-Rated Industry from renowned celebrity photographer Michael Grecco has been released. We interviewed Grecco on our July 13th, 2008 show about his book of the same title. This is the film version, chronicling his work doing art photography of adult stars. You can find the trailer on Youtube.